March 2, 2020
It’s been 1 year, 10 months and 3 weeks since I made a commitment to myself to get back into shape.
When working towards anything in life, you will always have your ups and downs. I have had some ups, but I would bet more downs if I was to tally them up.
I don’t really have the time or desire to break down what all has happened since I last wrote back in week 41, but I will give a bit of a recap . Weight and fitness wise, I have lost and went back up and have lost again. I am weighing in at 188 right now and am starting to get a lot of my muscle mass back.
One of my favorite songs released by my best friends band Sunsleeper has a line that says “This year has been nothing but a blur”. I can’t think of a better way to sum up 2019.
To start the year off, I was working a dead-end job that literally ate away at my soul every day. I hated waking up every week day knowing I had to go back there and put in another useless 8 hours. However, I have responsibilities and I am the sole provider for my family at the moment. On January 2nd, my second child and my first son, Owen was born. I was instantly in love, and now a father to two wonderful children.
I soon decided enough was enough at my dead end job and needed to do better for my family. I ended up landing a job with a new company, more or less doing the same thing but had tons of potential for growth and overall, a better salary. I started that new job right after getting back from paternity leave, in late January.
A month later, at my new job and with a brand new baby boy, my life and existence as I knew it collapsed. My brother in-law, but really, my brother, passed away at the age of 27. My wife and I were his primary caretakers when his parents weren’t available for the previous 6 or so years. He was basically a son to my wife. My brother, Tyler, had special needs and needed 24/7 care and we were the ones who gave him that care. When he passed, everyone who was close to him had to relearn how to live. For the length of my entire relationship with my wife, we had helped watch him. Help share the responsibility and time that he needed. Then one day, all of a sudden, he was gone. We are still learning to this day, a year later now, how to live without him. How to heal from losing someone so dear to you and how to find happiness once again.
Soon after his passing, we decided that we needed to move. Start over fresh, and live somewhere that won’t be a constant reminder of his absence. In order to do that however, we had to do some updating on the house so that we could get the most money out of it possible. So, the next couple of months consisted of remodeling a kitchen, painting, selling a house for the first time and shopping for a house, all while trying to heal from the loss we were all experiencing.
After we finally got through the stress of moving while all of those other factors played in the background, we started setting up our lives again. We organized our new house, re-set up my home gym, and started finding a home for all of the stuff we had moved and had to buy all the stuff we needed/wanted for the new space we suddenly found ourselves in.
We moved in, in July. Then in October, came the busy season at my work. My current job is still in the Medicare field and every year we have the “Annual Enrollment Season”. This is an 8 week long period every year where it is crazy as it can get. This means tons of overtime, and for myself, required overtime. It’s a great time to make great money, don’t get me wrong. that part of it is really nice. But the hours and work is brutal.
After that, we had Christmas, spending time with family and friends and yeah, plenty of tears along the way. Finally, after a couple more events like my Boy’s first birthday, we finally are back to current time, here and now.
Wow, what a crazy year.
I have decided to start writing again because well, I miss it, and honestly I need to.
Writing for me is such a good way of keeping all my thoughts sorted out and understandable. When I don’t write, I feel overwhelmed and out of sorts. Writing music used to be my outlet for that. Now, this blog has been the only thing that allows me to express my thoughts and ideas in a fashion that I hope will eventually help someone along the way.
Fitness to me is the same as writing. If I am not working out, and pursing a better version of myself, I just feel lousy. No other way to put it. Straight up, lousy.
So, that’s that. I will be updating this blog as much as I can so be sure to check in and I will keep pursing my goals and my dreams. I hope someone can take something from these entries along the way.
You’re not getting any younger.